Sunday, September 23, 2012

Top 11 Duet Mashups I'd Do

It seems that so many songs these days have "feat. ___________" in the title.  It's kinda been the rage for the last ten or twelve years.  Basically, it's a way for record companies to get you to explore other artists so they can get you to start buying their music too.  I would've never checked out any songs by P!nk if it weren't for her duet, "Misery", with Steven Tyler.  Just goes to show how impressionable we all are.

I even have a guest vocalist on my new album.  Ashlynn York provides the narrative to my song "Seventeen".  It's pretty rad, and so is she.

So here are eleven song titles you might find in a Bizarro World somewhere, if these duets could ever be possible.

my song titles from the new album
11. Ryan Fan Club feat. Debbie Gibson
...our song would be: "Shake Your Dirty Blooze"

10. Ryan Fan Club feat. Celine Dion
...our song would be: "My Hot Mess Will Go On"

9. Ryan Fan Club feat. Nicki Minaj
...our song would be: "Her Empty Starships"

8. Ryan Fan Club feat. Madonna
whitney houston's zombie
...our song would be: "Ray Of Lightning Skies"

7. Ryan Fan Club feat. Gwen Stefani
...our song would be: "Spiderwebs' Sin"

6. Ryan Fan Club feat. Alicia Keys
...our song would be: "Fallin' Slow"

5. Ryan Fan Club feat. Whitney Houston's Zombie
...our song would be: "I Will Always Lizzy Shue"

4. Ryan Fan Club feat. Taylor Swift
i bop, you bop, everybody bops!
...our song would be: "Mean Meaning"

3. Ryan Fan Club feat. Carly Rae Jepson
...our song would be: "Bootleg Me Maybe"

2. Ryan Fan Club feat. Katy Perry
...our song would be: "Seventeenage Dream"

1. Ryan Fan Club feat. Cyndi Lauper
...our song would be: "Menage A She Bop"

And there you have it!  Eleven mash-ups you'll probably never see... and with good reason!

Don't forget to go to iTunes to buy my new album.  It's only $9.90, and you'll be supporting independent artistry.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Big In Japan!

... of course I'm big in Japan.

With today being the release day of "Untitled Album", I thought I'd do something a little different and spotlight the album in Japan:

Check it out at: http://www.amazon.co.jp/Untitled-Album-Explicit/dp/B009724IDW/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1347991725&sr=8-4

And if you don't live in Japan, you can get it at: iTunes or Amazon.com.

Thanks to everyone who has already purchased the new record online.  I really appreciate your support.  Let's make this one the best one yet!

- ryan

Friday, September 14, 2012

No NHL = No Friends

So the evil Bettman might just finally succeed at stealing the NHL season away from us good people of Hockeytropolis City.  Or something like that.

the bear is always right.
All I really know, is that I don't know what I'll do without an NHL season for 2012-13.
You see, I'm a huge Bruins fan. Ask my wife.  She'll tell you I have too many Bruins jerseys, and that they "all look the same".  Most of my friends are Canadiens fans.  So you can imagine the heated conversations that occur between us during the hockey season.  They usually result in lots of cursing at each other, calling each other names that refer to us having sexual relations to members of the same sex, and me reminding them that the Bruins won a Stanley Cup in 2011.

Then they say, "well the Habs have 25 bajillion Stanley Cups and the Bruins only have six..."

... Jesus, I hate those Habs.  Bunch of fucking Habs...

Anyway, I fear that without having hockey this fall my friends and I will have nothing to talk about.  I mean, what am I gonna do, brag about how I beat the Habs 19-2 in NHL13 for the Xbox? I can't really put a lot of stock in that.

On a side note, I have a couple friends who are Canucks fans.  That's just awful.  Don't get me wrong, I hate the Canadiens, but I can understand why someone would cheer for them.  I respect the team that's been in Montreal since the dawn of poutine... doesn't mean I have to like them.

my daughter in 2011 holding a bruins stanley cup
The Canucks..  they need to just fuck off and grow a pair.

So back to the lockout.  The last time there was a lockout, everyone started watching and playing poker on Saturdays to fill the ice gap.  I can't see myself going back to poker.  That was definitely a fad, and I ended up playing just as much Rummoli as I did poker anyway.  Maybe curling?

Nope.  Not doing that any time soon.

So basically, there needs to be a hockey season.  Without it, I'll have nothing to talk to my friends about and I'll get very lonely.  And if there's no hockey on TV, I might have to actually pay attention to what my wife is talking about.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

if it's an untitled album, what's it about?

... so I've been getting asked a lot about the new album.  Sure, you can check out "Menage A Moi" right now.  I've received lots of great feedback about it already. But what about the other songs?  Well, let me tell you...

Bootleg Me - it was the second song that was worked on... and it's pretty much about just wanting to go home... but you can't... and all the things that keep you going until you can get home...

Menage A Moi - ever had a super awesome girl in your life that just wasn't putting out, but kept hinting that she was going to?

untitled album, by ryan fan club
Dirty Blooze - this one is just a tribute, really, to all the great blues guitars and harps out there... it was meant to sound as typical as possible, and I'm a bit too satisfied with the final product...

Spider's Sin - the closest thing to metal on the album, it's definitely the hardest pumping in-your-face rock song I've ever done... and i shout "mother fucker" as loud as i can

Sinking Slow - the lyrics were written while my mother was in the intensive care unit battling cancer this past spring... so it's kinda special to me that way...

Lizzy Shue - from the point of view of Tom Cruise's character, Bryan Flannagan, in the movie "Cocktail"... that fleeting love... the one who you can't bear to let get away... if the shue fits, baby, then you got to wear it twice... been waiting six years to do this song proper justice...

Seventeen - featuring Ashlynn York on co-vocals... another episode of men are from mars and teenage girls are from venus... but gosh, they're just so pretty that it makes it okay to put up with their ridiculous stupid immature shit...

Her Empty Trust Fund - jazzy sounding jam... really out there... no lyrics, just scatting...

Hot Mess - dirty/funky/swaggering... it's a song your mom doesn't want you to hear... lyric: "you've got to let me lick clean your hot mess"... a song about what we all think of, but never talk about...

Lightning Skies - "out of time... forgotten good-byes... lightning skies... tears in your eyes... so this is how we're supposed to live... all i can give is all i can give..."

... so which new song are you most excited to hear?